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A Girl’s Guide to Friendship: The Vault

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Renee Claybion

Renee's knack for telling it like it is and looking at life with a bit of humor gives her a unique voice and perspective. Renee can be found singing at the top of her lungs in LA traffic, enjoying her favorite horror films and playing around with her rambunctious 8 year old son Aidan.

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All right ladies, it’s time to talk about friendship. Not the go shopping, grab a latte part of friendship, I’m talking about the gritty, pick you up off the floor and hide the evidence part of friendship. The side that provides us with endless private jokes and can make two friends feel like sisters. The secrets we keep for each other bond us, the sloppy girl’s nights that never get reported back to boyfriends, the dark confessions that are held in confidence for eternity and the trust we instill in each other.

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A few months ago I went on a little girl’s road trip with some longtime friends and by longtime I mean close to a decade of friendship, the friends that have my trust without question or doubt. This was the kind of weekend road trip every girl is waiting for and when some newer friends decided to join, not surprisingly a few eyebrows were raised.  My friends and I have always had this understanding that when things get wild or someone goes a little too far, it’s our responsibility as friends to protect their honor.

Does that sound archaic and ninja like? Well, it is. And while it may seem kind of intense, between my friends it only takes one look to know when a situation warrants lock down. You see, my friends and I have this understanding and whenever we’re about to get into some crazy shit we initiate– The Vault.

 

What the hell is The Vault?

Simply put the vault is the place in your mind where all the torrid information and memories are stored, never to be revisited or spoken of unless with another member. Picture rows and rows of filing cabinets filled with good times and belly aching laughs.  The vault is like the temple of friendship, it holds all the most valuable scrolls of time spent together and it should always be treated with the utmost respect.

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Get my flow? It’s serious shit ladies, not just any friend can be trusted to keep vault information. Those few times that warrant the vault are priceless. They aren’t just the wild ones, they can be those pajama clad, pizza party, cries and Netflix nights too.

 

Who’s in?

Ok so now you get the gravity of the vault so let’s get into the members. One would assume that membership in the vault is exclusive to a longtime friendship, to the ones that share that awkward third grade photo with you. Unfortunately, just because you’ve known someone for a long time does not mean they will truly be there for you. It’s been my experience that the greatest and most loyal of friends are the ones you’d least expect. The people you include in your vault are the ones that you can call in the middle of a Wednesday night in tears and within thirty minutes they’re on your doorstep with a gallon of Ben and Jerry’s. The friends that will stand up and defend you first, and ask questions later, because no matter what you do they’ll be there. Sometimes you meet a person and just know that they’ll be in your life forever so don’t worry about how long you’ve known someone if you trust them, they’re in your vault, simple as that.

continue reading for more on the The Vault…

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  • http://theindiechicks.com/ Chiara Mazzucco

    This is my most favorite post you’ve ever written.

  • Chrystal Rose

    I freaking love this. And I love that we share some space in the same vault ;)

    I’ve always been the kind of person that is told shit right off the bat you normally wouldn’t share with anyone. A lot of people, friends, acquaintances and strangers feel the need to tell me their deep, dark secrets– and it’s a responsibility I don’t take lightly. But nothing is better than having those girlfriends right there in the vault with you.

    ::claps hands::

  • Ashley Sapp

    Loved this! The sentence, “Having friends that you can rely on and call on when you need to let loose or cry like an idiot makes all the other shit we deal with easier” speaks volumes. Well done!

  • http://katybkatydidnot.blogspot.com/ Katy B.

    Love your article, Jules! It’s a rare treasure to find people with whom a person can truly “vault” their shared information and trust its safety there, and those of us who have are lucky.

    • Jewels

      Katy, if you’re lucky enough to have friends you can ‘vault’ with then you’re lucky enough. I’m glad you enjoyed the article but I didn’t write it…Renee did but I am sure she thanks you. :D